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| Sunday, February 17, 2008 |
| Ghetto Queen |
If there's such thing as the past life, I think I was a black woman. A hot bootylicious black woman that is. Ok, this is how I imagine my life if I am a black woman...
Hey its yo girl, Dominik. Dominik right now, is walking to the beauty shop to have Dominik's wigs and face done, and of course to meet with Dominik's girls. Dominik knows, Dominik attracts wondering eyes coz there's aint no queen in Harlem other than Dominik. Dominik knows Dominik is so fine. You can't put a price on all this phat booty and puppies. Dominik knows every man want to dip this hot coochie, but Dominik already has a man. Dominik will tell you later about that.
When Dominik arrives at the Letiqua's Beauty Shop, the air filled with joyous celebration, coz they know the queen has arrived fo' sho. Everyone greeted Dominik with hugs and kisses, and Dominik feel the love. There's Lashanda, Monique, Paprica, Camille, Ebony but Dominik ain't see no Kiesha...
"Yo, where's Kiesha? Bitch better not be frontin'..." Dominik holler'd.
"Girl, haven't you heard? She got black eyes after she bumps with Moesha. That's what what you got when you jumpin' other hoe's man. She had it coming." Monique replies under the heavy curling heater.
"Man, that's trippin'. Is she ok?" Deminik is concern.
"Bitch with Momma D's. She's gonna be aite. But whatever, its aint her fault. Moesha is so damn ugly, she looked out her window and was arrested for indecent exposure!" Ebony hisses followed with eruptuous laughters form the girls.
"Amen to that! She's so ugly, her momma had to be Pissed drunk just to breast feed her." Camille chipped in.
"Her momma is so fat, she was measured at 38-26-36 and that was just the left arm..." Lashanda shares her wit.
Ahhh... Dominik loves her gurls. They may be not as pretty as Dominik, but they are the hands that put Dominik on this padestal. They are also the place to go when Dominik faces trouble. Like the day when Kareem dumped Dominik for that sleazy hoe Ayesha, or the nite when Marcus hit Dominik so bad, the girls went crayzay and kick his ass so bad, and sent him to jail fo good. Aint no thugz better mess with us.
So tonight Dominik is hittin the club with the girls. Mr.B's iz the shyt to be. Got the most delish boys you could get your hands on to. Dominik put on this tiny top that'll put Lil' Kim to shame, and enough blings that'll make any nigga go blind.
The DJ plays Dominik's home gurl Ciara's jam, and the dancefloor is flooded with humpin and grindin. While Dominik is enjoying Dominik's Panties Dropper, a fine playa come talkin to Dominik.
"Hey yo baby girl. I aint understand why a girl so fine, so lonely tonite"
"I aint lonely. Me and my girls just chillin, waitin a right man to come." Dominik decides to go with the flow.
"Baby gurl, I'm the man you been waitin fo."
"Kurli hair with dem soft lucious lips. Sexy thighs with dem fuckin killa hips. Ghetto ass with da most tightest jeans. I'll be dat sexy gurl dats up in your dreams." Dominik casts a bait.
"Aite.. aite.."Boy is lickin his lips.
"Please tell your pants that it's not polite to point!" Dominik in hoe autopilot.
"I lost my teddy bear, can I sleep with you tonight?" Playa is playin'..
"With the lace thongs and the work of my tongue. Beautiful eyes - phat ass - I got you sprung!" Dominik's playin the game.
"If you're gonna kiss me don't make it sassy, use some tongue and make it nasty!" Playa sends waves of electric that made Dominik's cherry tingle.
"Notorious from head to toe, nawty as hell but I aint no hoe" Dominik play it down.
Just as playa is about to kiss this lucious lips, a rude pull came tugging his's shoulder...
"Ayyo bitch! Is the streets lights out, coz my man aint sleepin with no hoe tonite!" Fumed a black ass woman with ugly fro and cheap hoop earrings.
"Aw.. come on Chardonnay. I'm just playin" the playa turns pussy.
"Not now Jay!" The bitch hisses.
"Make sure you can back up, what you flap up... otherwise... shut the fuck up!" Dominik roared.
"Bitch please! You tried to snatch my man, hoe. Ready to make an entrance so back it up. Cuz you know this shorti bout to tear it up!" Bitch can't stop yappin.
The girls are standing, claws out. "I got this." Dominik assures her soulja.
"DOnt get mad when ya man turns around and licks his lips, while sayin 'wait a min'. It aint my fault I was born with these nice ass hips." Flames Dominik.
"Come on bitch wanna get things started? No need to fuck you up, you already look retarded." What? Bitch dares to call Dominik a retard?
"I'm sick of all these lil' bytchez flappin. Keep on yappin... cuz pretty soon Imma start slappin." its the cue line, and my gurls step forward besides Dominik, crackin 'em fingers.
"You really aint that pretty, you really aint that smart. So what gives you da right, to think you can tear people apart?"Bitch start crying.
"You're not worth my time and can't take my place. So whatever you gotta say hoe, say it to my face." Dominik is about to slap the black outta that bitch.
"Come on, Chardonnay, let's go." Pussy Jay pulls his bitch away from Dominik.
"All ya hoes think yo fine? Haha.. bitch please... I'll steal ya man and still keep mine." Bitch throw a cheap shot while retreating to the exit door.
"You talk shit, say it without a trace. Come on be a gangsta chick and say it to ma face. If you cant walk da walk, dont talk da talk. Cuz fake lil bitches get outlined in chalk!" Dominik is keeping her class.
 Labels: funny, me:bigot, rant |
posted at 2:21 PM   |
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“Count your smiles instead of your tears; Count your courage instead of your fears.”
~ Unknown
“I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
~ Maya Angelou
“The secret of Happiness is Freedom, and the secret of Freedom, Courage.”
~ Thucydides
“Everything becomes a little bit different as soon as it is spoken out loud”
~ Hermann Hesse
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Debt Consolidation
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