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© 2008 gdjock@yahoo.com
Monday, June 02, 2008
The Beautiful Game

OK suddenly in the middle of my boring office life, staring blankly at my pc wallpaper (its Cristiano Ronaldo Nike ad by the way), I find myself reminiscing the good ol' days of childhood. I have to admit that I'm totally suck at football. Not like girls futsal team suck, but more like geeky 'kaki bangku' suck. I can rembat blindly or dribble a lil bit, but most of the time I fumbled. So my strategy was to locate my teammates around me and pass it as soon as the ball reached me.(more after the link...)

There's a blatant caste in a children football team. The forwards are usually the kids who are the star of the team. The Maradona. The Cantona. That, or the ball owner. Usually the over-pampered bratty kids who are ok at football. They will run with the ball and the chances that they pass the ball around is like the chances of Pamela Anderson turning into a nun. Then, there's the mid fielders. The mid fielders are mostly more grounded good players. Either that or they are less popular than the aforementioned forwards. These kids usually switches role with the forwards whenever the forwards loss their breath.

The defenders are the kids who are suck at football. The nerds, the fat-asses and the bapuks. Their main purpose is to be the punching bags for the other team's forwards. People just don't pass the ball to these losers coz surely they will lose the ball. Lastly, the gatekeeper and the last hope; the goalkeeper.The goalkeeper is usually the fattest ass in the team coz they are naturally wide and they're not good at running. Plus the ball will bounce the extra distance against their flabby belly.

Mostly the game will end with fightings either between teammates or inter-team. Colurful cuss words will fly which usually involves somebody's parents having pre marital sex and giving birth to a bastard. The game will end when azan started or somebody's mother shrieking is heard. "Mamat BAAALLEEEKKK!!! Mandiiii!".

When I was a kid, football was a big deal. Malaysian football that is. We worship football stars like Fendi Ahmad, Ervin Boban, Allistair Edwards and Abbas Saad. When Johor won Malaysian Cup on 1991, we all were overjoyed and we talked about nothing but the muddy final for the whole week. However like the rest of Malaysians, my affection for Malaysian football simply ended after the corruption scandal in Malaysian football in the late 90's.

"Joga bonito"

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posted at 4:20 PM  

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~ Unknown

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