Kepada member arwah Z yang aku rasa cam pernah terserempak masa tapisan keselamatan,

Aku antara bebudak Chambers yang ada ngan arwah during his last moments. In fact, i was one of the 3 people whom tried to revive arwah when he collapsed outside badminton hall. Bila aku baca blog korang, aku rasa nak share saat2 terakhir dan apa yang benar2 berlaku pada hari tu. Banyak sangat version cerita sampai tahap mengarut pun ader gak. So, sebagai org yang berada kat situ, aku nak berkongsi apa yg benar2 berlaku. In fact, i was only able to talk bout this after so many times i broke down on that fateful day.

Arwah Z memang suka main sukan. badminton was his last game. walaupun dia reserved and the team had already won, arwah requested nak main gak. So, he played single. Almost perfect game. Every tricks, drop yg dia buat, semuer nya almost 8.5 -9 out of 10. he wont 1st set. Muka kewl giler tapi bila kat luar court tercungap2. Kitorang stopped him from playing in 2nd set walaupun dia leading. Arwah dah nampak cam takder angin. Siap joking, "aku takder angin ler...nampak bintang!"

Kitorang suh dia duduk, kibas2kan angin guna towel n suh dia bukak kasut. Arwah joked lagi: "aku terasa cam pengantin laik, kena kipas2 camni". Lepas tu, bila tengok arwah dah ok sket, bleh berjalan, one of the seniors suruh arwah gi ambik fresh air kat luar. En Din gi temankan arwah.

Aku nya game tak start lagi, tengah jejalan tetiber nampak En Din (crawling on the floor) bukak pintu mintak tolong dia. Aku ingat ker suh tolong angkat barang ker apa...tengok2, nampak arwah Z dah terbaring atas pool of 100plus on the floor. Ingat ker dia kena asthma attack or fit! So, me n en din baringkan arwah betul2, regangkan kedua-dua jari2 arwah, bukak mulut so that he can breathe properly. Masa tu semuer org stopped playing and was outside the hall with us. Anas held arwah's head, looked at me n En Din saying that arwah wasnt breathing. At that moment, we just had to whatever we can. Revive arwah in whatever means we have. Aku tak terfikir langsung that u were almost gone at that moment. Aku cuma buat apa yang termampu untuk selamatkan arwah. Buat CPR.... anas buat kiraan, en din buat mouth to mouth CPR, aku tekan jantung arwah. Hanya Allah sahaja yang tau apa yg kitorang rasa masa tu... We never gave up on you, Z! We kept pumping air to you, 5-6 times. Calling out your name. To be with us no matter what.

Andy came with his car. Drove like madness to Selangor Medical Centre. Bila aku tengok arwah dah masukkan dalam keta, aku turned back and saw few girls started crying. Depa kata kaki arwah dah sejuk. Nampak lifeless. Then, reality hits me...I've lost arwah..I collapsed n broke down.

Bila sampai kat SMC, diorang kata docs tengah mencuba. Aku tak fikir apa2 hanya mampu berdoa dan hopefully miracle would happen. After few moments of waiting, it felt like a terrible nightmare happening slowly in front of my eyes. A team-mate ran towards me crying. The only words I heard before aku collapsed n broke down were: "He passed away..He didnt make it."

Hati aku cam dirobak2...aku ilang sorang ofis-mate, team-mate, junior officer yg aku selalu panggil "boss" sebab dia panggil aku camtu gak dan seorang kawan yang baik. Walaupun kitorang tak lepak sangat, tapi kitorang keje pagi petang sesama kat international affairs division. Tukus lumus layan tensen keje sesama.... Apa2 hal, i treated him like my own brother.

Pemergian arwah Z adalah suatu kehilangan yang kami semua rasai kat ofis ni. Hampir satu ofis pergi raub untuk pay our last respect to arwah. I was glad that i talked to your mom personally bout your last moments with us. How extremely grateful we are to have arwah Z as our officemate. And how determined we are to win that badminton tournament for you, Arwah Ahmad Zulkamal Shahrir. May you rest in peace, Al-Fatihah.

-Words in Memorial-
Norsharin Alias aka Ayin
Officemate, badminton team-mate n friend of

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Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there,
I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight
On the ripened grain.
I am the gentle Autumn's rain.
When you awaken in the morning hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there.
I did not die.
My Spirit is still alive…
-- Hopi prayer

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"On the contrary, it wasnt really a heart attack whilst he was playing badminton. It was actually a brain hemorrhage due to blood rush. He didnt collapse at the badminton court. It was after he was stopped from playing, standing outside to take fresh air.

Doc said arwah was like a walking time bomb. It was unfortunate that it happened at that moment. Nonetheless, he passed away peacefully, without any pain and surrounded by loving, caring friends.

Even at his funeral, close friends, colleagues, bosses were there to pay their last respect.

Dont take your life for granted. No matter how stressful it can be, take some time to rest well."

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